The Simple (Minded) Life

I've never had a cell phone
Nor a DVD
I wouldn't know how to use them,
They're all Greek to me.

I've never rented cable
I don't watch much T.V.
As long as I can watch my soaps
That's O.K. with me.

I've never had a skate board
I've never learned to skate
I've been told that at my age
It's really much too late.

I've never left the country
Cause I'm afraid to fly
I guess I'm just a coward
A claim I won't deny.

If I were meant to fly
I'd be born with wings;
I know that I am earth-bound
It's just one of those things.

I've heard that people bungee-jump,
Or dive from flying planes;
The thought of such bravado
Gives me stomach pains.

I've been told my life is dull
That's O.K. with me
Just driving down the thruway
Is exciting enough for me.

Some live their lives in passing lane
Back roads are my best bet;
Just waking up each morning
Is as brave as I can get!